Why I Play Rugby

This has been my third year playing for my college’s women’s rugby team. In that time, I have gone from rookie, to prop, to veteran, to lock, to playing any scrum position, to vice president and forward captain. Though it may sound like it, these past three years weren’t all smooth sailing. I suffered self-esteem problems early in my first season. During my second season, I had a massive decrease in my self-confidence. I have messed up both of my knees, gotten two concussions, drove into a ditch on my way to a tournament, and even had to go to the ER from falling on my neck. I have been on a roller coaster of believing in myself and having no faith in myself. So after all of this, why do I still play?

First of all, I love it. I have always liked most sports, and participated in cross country and track in high school. I was never very good at sports, but that didn’t keep from enjoying them. Until now. I have never fallen in love with a sport like I have with rugby, and I also happen to be kind of good at it. I love the surge of power I feel when I step onto the pitch in my jersey. I love the way my body aches the next morning, as though I got hit by a truck. I love to show off the numerous bruises I get from tackling and being tackled. I love the feeling of wrapping my arms around a girl and bringing her to the ground. I love running head on into a mass of girls, and plowing my way through them. I love the look on my team’s face when they do something amazing. I love the feeling of forgetting everything expect the game. There is nothing in this world, not even writing, that makes me feel as free as rugby does. But it’s not all about me.

This season has been, by far, my favorite season ever. Why? Because I love my team so much. There are a group of beautiful, talented, and unique women. Not only do they play wonderfully, but they are also so kind and compassionate to each other. They work hard and take care of each other. It’s not just our new girls; our new coach brings so much to the team and never stops teaching us to be better. I’ve only known her for a few months, and she has already taught me so much. I’ll admit, sometimes I miss all of the girls that have moved on, but the chemistry I had with them wasn’t as strong as the chemistry I have with this team. I wish we had been closer as a team. I loved my vets, they taught me how to play this beautiful sport, but now I don’t feel like I need to prove anything to anybody. I can just play the game I love. These girls look up to me and respect me in ways I didn’t thing I was worthy of on a rugby level. I love my team. They make every pain and every struggle worth it.

I also love our boy’s team. They are the boys I go to when I need something. They may sometimes have a reputation for negative things, but I am proud to know them as some of the best people I have ever met. They are so kind and funny and honest. I trust them. Sometimes they even take care of me. The bonds I have created with the boys’ team are ones I am so thankful for. Watching them play just happens to be an added bonus. I would do as much for their team as I would my own team.

Rugby gave me a place in college, along with a dysfunctional family. I met my current roommate through rugby, and she is one of my best friends. My guy best friend (Looking to you, BBF) is a rugby player for the boys. The people I go out with are ruggers. My closest friends are ruggers. The people who know me best are ruggers. I never imagined myself playing a sport like this, let alone succeeding at it. I love that it makes me unique. I love the look on people’s faces when I tell them I play rugby. I love being a part of something so amazing that is filled with so many wonderful people. I love tackling an opposing team, and that sitting in a circle eating food and laughing with them, because we leave everything on the field. I love how we protect and stick up for each other. I love spending my Saturday mornings taking the field with my girls.

As this season is rapidly coming to an end, I know that I will love the extra free time at first. But it won’t be long until I get a familiar urge, and will begin counting down the days until spring season starts. That is why I play rugby.

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Why I Love Halloween

It is no secret to my friends and family that Halloween is by far my favorite holiday. It always has been. I wait all year for the one night where I can put on an awesome costume and let my full freak flow. Here are the top 10 reasons I love Halloween more than any other day of the year. Sit back, relax, and drink your pumpkin spice lattes (which I hate by the way) and enjoy!

  1. You can be anything or anyone for one night

In my opinion, this is the best part of Halloween. The possibilities are endless. You can be scary, pretty, funny, or any combination of the three. You can wear an obnoxious dress or a funky wig, and no one can really judge you for it… well they can, but not as much as they would on a normal day. You can act sassy when you’re actually sweet or ditzy when you’re actually smart, or any way you want to. It’s a great opportunity to be someone or something else, even if it is just for one night. It’s a way to show your creativity off to everyone. The possibilities are endless. I have seen a male sexy camp counselor, Shaggy and Scooby, a gum ball machine, Pikachu and Ash, Superman, Venus, Winnie the Pooh, and even Twister! And that was just in the past two years. Halloween brings out the fun and free spirit in all of us, and I love every part of it. I’ve been frantically trying to get my tutu done on time!

  1. The fun makeup

While I understand that this does tie into the costume thing, I feel it deserves it’s own separate category. Halloween makeup is so much fun! There’s zombies, vampires, princesses, and everything in between. There is always such amazing makeup on Halloween, it’s as though everyone either is or knows a makeup artist. I also love doing my makeup on Halloween, because I love bright color and glitter. I can go overboard on those for Halloween and be bold with my makeup without being laughed at. I absolutely love doing my makeup for Halloween, and cannot wait to do my fairy face next week!

  1. Scaring others as well as yourself

I love all the scary movies, haunted houses, and just creepy things that go with Halloween. I love scaring other people, especially my roommates! I always get such a laugh out of their squeals. I also love scaring myself by sitting down to watch a horror movie or forcing myself to walk through the haunted corn maze. A little harmless scare is always fun… after my heart rate slows down of course. Except these creepy clowns that keep popping up everywhere. Seriously guys, that isn’t funny. It’s terrifying.

  1. It is acceptable to eat candy until you puke

What other holiday can you consume mass quantities of Reese’s Cups and Kit Kats until you feel sick? No one will be surprised if you polish the whole bag of candy, because they probably have one of their own they’ve been eating the whole night. This is especially a perk for all those trick-or-treaters out there. It’s also beneficial for those trick-or-treaters older siblings; they get the candy without having to do the work. Forget cooking a nice dinner, and bring on the Milky Ways!

  1. The decorations

I love the spooky Halloween decorations: the pumpkins on porches, the ghosts swaying from trees, the skeleton in the doorway, the spider webs in the corner, all of them! They are so much fun and can even be a little spooky. As much as I love Christmas lights, nothing beats a house that is all decked out in Halloween. Plus, there’s a bonus: You don’t have to dust out those cobwebs. They’re festive!

  1. It’s in Fall

I think we can all agree that Fall is the best season. Okay, maybe that’s just me. I love the Fall more than anything, so it’s extra awesome that Halloween happens to fall in Fall (see what I did there?) I love smells, the colors, the apple everything, and the pumpkins (a vital part of Halloween). The fact that my favorite holiday is in my favorite season makes both Halloween and Fall that much more enjoyable! Good bye Summer and beaches and HELLOOOOOO Fall and cider!

  1. The parties

Nothing beats a good Halloween bash, especially in college. They are fun to plan, decorate for, and attend. Plus, a ton of people get to see your awesome costume. Plus, there are so many great games: bobbing for apples, cemetery scavenger hunts, witch hunting, hayrides the possibilities are endless! I cannot wait for the Halloween parties to come!

  1. The Movies

Who doesn’t love to curl up on the couch and dive into Hocus Pocus and Halloweentown? In my opinion, these are two of the best classic Halloween movies. My holiday wouldn’t be complete without watching these at least once. Halloween movies, even the not so scary ones, are always great to watch. Nothing beats watching Max light that black flamed candle!

  1. You are not required to buy anyone anything

Buying Christmas and birthday presents is always such a hassle. And how about that bottle of wine or pumpkin pie you feel obligated to bring for Thanksgiving? This isn’t the case with Halloween. No one cares if you show up empty handed, as long as you come in a costume and are ready to party! You get to skip the stress but still have all the fun.

  1. The day after candy sales

MAJOR PERK! Sure Halloween is AWESOME, but we have to talk about November 1st. That glorious day when all the unsold Halloween candy drops to half price, and the candy is crawling with children, teenagers, and adults all hoping there’s at least one bag of chocolate bars left. Everything is on sale and just waiting for the taking. So be sure to get an early start to take full advantage of these sales. It’s a great to stock up on a supply of candy that can last until next Halloween. Who am I kidding? It barely makes it to Thanksgiving.

I hope you all have a wonderfully spooky Halloween and stay safe. I’ll be rocking my kick ass fairy costume and partying it up with some of the best people. I hope you all get as much fun out of this holiday as I do. Rock your awesome costumes, let your inner makeup artist shine, and continue being spooktacular!

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Affirmations

These pages were very interesting and emotional to do, but were also very emotional and therapeutic. I started with the negative things, because I prefer to end on a positive note (which you may have noticed on my blog posts). The negative thoughts page include things that are often floating around in my mind, especially on my down days. These are things that often come to mind during my worst days and are even things people have told me. Many of these thoughts have been around in my head for years, and they love to torment me, such as “You are unlovable.” Some of them are relatively new, such as “You are a waste of time.” But this page also served the purpose of things I need to shut down when they enter my mind. They are thoughts that I need to ignore, and stop telling myself. It also helps me to see these thoughts spelt out in pretty, glittery colors, because it makes them see so harmless.
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I then did the positive page. These are things I can tell myself to feel better, especially when the negative thoughts creep in. This page can help me feel better about myself and remind myself of my good qualities. Many of these things are phrases people have said to me that make me feel so much better. These are things I need to reinforce to myself. The interesting thing you will probably notice is that there are many more negative phrases than positive phrases. This is because it is so much easier to tear yourself down than it is to build yourself up, which is a very sad concept. Unfortunately, it is one that is true for most of us. Therefore, I am working on building myself up by building others up (thus the point of the blog). These pages are a lot of fun to creative with and can also be really beneficial in the long run. They can also easily be referred back to and added to.

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5 Things to Say to Ruin a Relationship

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Let me start by saying that these phrases work beyond romantic relationships. They can also work for friendships, acquaintances, friends with benefits, and anything in between. So if you have someone you wish would just exit your life, this is the way to go. If one doesn’t work, try two… or all five! If you try all of these, and the person still doesn’t take the hint, maybe you need to be straight and just say, “I want you out of my life,” because they are clearly having trouble getting the memo. However, if you are a little more compassionate and can’t bring yourself to say these things to a person, you have two choices: take the coward’s way out and text them to the person or be a good person and let them off easy. This, of course, depends on how much pain you want to cause someone and how big your heart is, because no matter what that person is to you, this is sure to hit them in the heart. Hard. Use these phrases with discretion; I am not responsible for any consequences of you using these phrases. Good luck.

  1. “I have no interest in you other than sex”

So this one may not apply to straight friendships, but it’ll definitely do the job for any other kind. From friends with benefits to an actual relationship, this phrase is likely to stop a person in their tracks or at least force them to take some time to reevaluate the current situation. Now this one may not be too bad, depending on who you are, however it can definitely knock a person back a few steps.

 

  1. “I’ve been depressed too, but I grew up.”

When in doubt, if the person happens to have a mental illness, attack it! This doesn’t just work for depression; you can use it for anxiety, anorexia, a broken leg, or whatever else. Even if you haven’t had the illness yourself, you can still tell them the key to getting through it is growing up. From here, one of two things will happen: they will take your advice and magically be cured, (if that’s the case, you should seriously consider going into the psychology field) or the person will be so angered by your ignorance, they will stop talking to you. If it doesn’t get rid of them completely, it will definitely get them starting to think about walking away from whatever the relationship is.

 

  1. “I keep myself up by not talking to people like you.”

The key word in this fun phrase is “like.” You could easily nicen up the phrase by just saying “not talking to you,” but hey, go big or go home! Adding those extra few words, especially “like,” makes it that much more effective. It will for surely make the person feel like a burden and an inconvenience to you. If you time it just right, it may even make them feel like a burden to everyone! If you are trying to push them out of your life, why not add the bonus of hurting their self-esteem? This is just the phrase for that. If this doesn’t get rid of them, it’s time to take drastic measures. Please refer to phrases 2 and 1.

 

  1. “I have to get ready for this chick that’s coming over.” “You can come over after she leaves if you want some D.”

Again, not one for just a plain old friendship, but for anything else, this should work. I understand that these are two phrases, and while you can use just one, they work so much better when used together. Ladies, you may have to change a few words for this one, but it is possible to use. Make sure this person knows they are easily replaced and that they truly are meaningless to you. This phrase will do just that. Beware: the person on the receiving end of this may become sad, angry, or both so BE PREPARED. Stick to your guns, when the argument stops, they probably will too. After all, no one likes knowing they are a second choice or can be replaced as easy as a broken phone. If this doesn’t work, you have one persistent nuisance on your hands! Proceed to phrase 1.

 

  1. “You are a waste of time”

Caution: Use this one ONLY if you are absolutely sure you want to end the relationship. This is hard one to recover from, so use it wisely. If you are sure you want this person out of your life for good, this is the one to use. It is guaranteed to go straight to the heart, and will probably haunt them for a while. This is a good thing, because it should keep them off your back. If a conversation for some reason persists, use it again. And again. I have come to the conclusion that at least five seems to be effective, and the safest number to get the desired results.

If these five phrases don’t get rid of your problem, then I don’t know what to tell you. This person probably either has a weird obsession or really bad self-esteem… or both. Maybe then it’s time to just shout, “Dude, get out of my life!” Or there is the tiniest possibility that this person sees something really good in you, and maybe you should reevaluate your decision to dump them out of your life. You never know, they could end up being really awesome.

Ok, now for some serious talk: I hope you all understood that this post was all satirical and sarcastic. I don’t think I could ever say these things to a person. So how do I know these phrases hurt people? Well they’ve been said to me. All of them. By the same person. I guess I was that annoying person… Oh well! Yes, these phrases made me feel awful. Granted they were all texted to me, but it still hurt. Bad. I must have read them over twenty times each, which doesn’t sound like a lot, but they were also constantly playing in my head. They made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. They made me feel like I did something wrong.

People, your words have power! Why do we want to make people hurt? No one deserves to have things like this said to them. NO ONE! So think about what you say to people, no matter what they mean to you and no matter what you are feeling. You can’t take your words back, and you can’t fully heal the wounds they leave on a person. It took me awhile to realize that I was worth more that how this person was treating me, in fact it took all five phrases. Looking back, one really should have opened my eyes, but I choose to see the good parts of people. I have realized that this doesn’t mean I have to put up with being talked to like this, because I am worth more. You are all worth more! While I know there is good in this person, I also have learned that this friendship is no longer for me. I have chalked it up as a learning experience, and have moved on with my life. I feel as though a large weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel much more at peace now that I’m not constantly stressing about it. That’s how you know the relationship, whatever it may be, is toxic. Be kind to others, and remember that YOU matter and YOU ARE WORTH IT! Don’t ever let anyone make you feel differently. You are a person and you deserve respect, no matter who you are. Keep being your perfectly awesome selves!